Submit.
JUndercovers was wondering recently how to reconcile his loving, sensitive personality with the side of him that enjoys responding to his wife's request to be dominated in bed.
I've discovered this dynamic recently, and I relish it. Through my current regimen of therapy, I've begun to figure out why.
All day long I am hyper-responsible. I'm organized. I'm concerned for all aspects of my family's life. I keep things running, clicking along. I do all the meal planning, grocery shopping, and cooking. I know when we need more diapers and that it's time to call the in-laws to check in.
So you know what? At the end of the day, I want to just melt. I want a sensory overload. I want Mrs. Smartypants to shut up about the laundry and the car repairs. I want to forget myself. My partner will tell me what to do, and I will obey.
Please give me this chance to be soft, yielding, and vulnerable. I'm so fucking strong all day. Let me rest. Take charge.
Use this body for its most primal purpose. Make me forget about lugging the kid into the car seat. My muscles need more to do than chores. Push me. Stretch me. Take me.
5 Comments:
My first sub was a manager at a hospital. She worked silly long hours and had to schedule hours, arrange for medical supplies and fire people. She was this smart, demanding powerful person and her fondest wish was to be put under the table and told to suck.
Another sub I had was a grade school teacher. She was a Goddess in her class room. Her kids worshipped her and at the end of the day, her fondest wish was to not have even a name. She just wanted to be an object to be used.
I could go on and on, but for the longest time I though all submissives were workaholics under too much stress. When I did encounter a sub who didn't have a job or any pressing responsibilities I was fascinated by the novelty of it. Ultimately though, I found she wanted the relationship to be the drama. I'd take the workaholic any day.
Wry,
I think most men would happily respond to your desire to be taken and used physically, but for me this would be appealing only as part of a broader diet. The thought of forcefully rolling you onto your stomach and tugging your white cotton panties down to your knees as I pulled my tool through the hole of my, yes, baggy broadcloth, white boxers, is very arousing to me. Would I finger fuck your ass as I took your hungry vagina from behind? I'm in charge, Right? I think I would. Could I do this if you took no joy from it? No. Would I rather make you come, first? Yes. Would I still want you to suck me afterwards-- taste yourself while submitting to my desire for that fleshly and visual pleasure? Absolutely. Too much info? Let me know. Love your blog. Think I have a crush on you.
-Day
I really appreciate this take on the situation, Wry, both here and in your comment on my blog. It's something that hadn't occurred to me before, but very well may be a part of it.
What I find even more confusing about the whole thing is that in everyday life, I'm like you've described yourself--very responsible, organized, always trying to be on top of everything, yet I find it difficult to take that role in the bedroom. Not sure if that's just being a chicken, or if it's a desire to let go of that side. But a good relationship is a compromise.
Shon: Sounds like some good experiences. Anything you've written about?
Day: Thanks for the kudos. You must have been a Boy Scout, for how prepared you seem to be.
PM: Interesting to hear that from a male perspective. What would that situation look like to you? Maybe there's an idea for a post for you. I know I'd read it.
J: Trust those manly instincts! Get in there and nail her! No seriously, sounds like you're in the fray, working hard. Good for you.
OH, yes...I am so with you.
Most of us want a chance to not have to be the responsible one, the one that everyone depends on.
Sometimes we just need to be...just need to be taken.
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