• Tuesday, October 16, 2007

    A Word of Explanation

    I guess if I say I'm still around, I'm exaggerating.

    Sometimes I hit the blog-o-sphere to see what everyone is up to. Generally, though, I'm too talked and thunk out by the end of the day. If I have energy to do something for myself, I exercise or read.

    I'm also finding that my rather pleasant life makes less compelling narrative. I have an OK job, a boyfriend who is the best of men, a son who impresses and delights me, amicable relations with my ex. . . . It's not easy to be a single mom, but that's simply the fact of my situation.

    I could get into personal details about fucking and love, some of the struggles to reinvent myself over this past year, friends who have disappointed me beyond measure. . .

    . . .but there's a problem. There's still one person out there who knows about this blog and may still check it. Earlier this summer I censored the personal details out of consideration for his feelings. At this point, he's simply forfeited the right to know what's inside my head and heart. We don't talk or communicate in any way, by mutual agreement.

    I'm not even going to write what I think of him or explain the situation to all of you simply because as he himself once told me, "If you don't want to engage with someone, don't engage with them. Period."

    This blog is the last open line he has to me, sorry to say. So that's why I don't say much. I do miss being out there with you.