The New Way
Welcome to December 1, 2006.
I've decided to make a pledge of celibacy for a little while.
I've been thinking about it for about a week now, relevant to what decisions and instincts will best serve me in the upcoming months. I'm facing the dissolution of my marriage and the creation of a new life. How, therefore, do I stay focused? It would be easy and fun to distract myself with the tumult of a sexual relationship. Wouldn't it be convenient to forget all the stuff I was suppposed to be dealing with? Ooooo the intrigue - such an exciting charge, a buzz to enliven my heart and body. I'd love to feel Something Else.
But I have too much to do and learn.
I have a lot of faith in myself, but not enough to trust my decisions about sex. If I chose to take a lover, I'd like to think I'd be doing it for the right reasons, but I think I'd secretly, or unconsciously be looking to fill a need or save me in a way that no one but I can. The depths of loneliness and sadness will be painful, but I need to go there and get myself back out again.
And it's also time to embrace humility, to admit that there's a lot I've done as a disservice to myself that I don't want to repeat.
So that's the deal for the next few months.
Awesome!
8 Comments:
I think besides humility, you are showing some wisdom.
I know a place where you can get a good price on a monk's habit.
And you do know that there are a LOT of disappointed guys out here right now? Just sayin.
I kinda think you may be making a good choice.
I totally monked out for months after my marriage broke up. I didn't WANT to talk to anybody.
You do need to deal with things alone for a bit.
(Even though I'd really like to fuck you *chuckle*)
I experimented with celibacy in college when I wasn't getting any anyway. I decided to try it since I was masturbating once or twice a day as is. I went for about a month and I found my sex drive dropped within two weeks. It does help you stay focus but I personally found it made me more grouchy. I hope it works for you.
I just wanted to tell you that I've read your blog from the beginning and it is amazing. I think you are funny, insightful, complicated and most interesting.
Sometimes you need to back off and take a break.
I can relate. Learn what you have to learn, and come back out when you're ready. Not that I know what I'm talking about. I don't have any solutions for anyone, either. Just support.
Hi WG,
Does biting your heels count as sex?
Does writing about sex help keep you celibate?
Love,
Chuck
I'm tired, hungover, and I smell of cheese.
Celibacy isn't a problem so far.
HI WG,
Mmmmmm.... cheeeeeeseeee!
I couldn't resist ;-)
Chuck
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